Team Building Skills
Poor Communication Behaviors
Just because you have the communication skills does not mean that everything will go smoothly. Some people have a tendency to become a little nasty when they do not like the message they are hearing. Some people become defensive, some attack, and some even try to sidetrack you.
Whenever you encounter one of these behaviors, do not let the person discourage you. Remember your message and stay focused.
- Agree/Disagree Act: First he agrees, and then he turns around and disagrees. This is confusing and frustrating.
- Cut You Off: This person will interrupt and question each point along the way. This is an effort to exhaust and confuse you.
- Nice but Rude Act: He is the person who appears to be giving you a compliment, but it is really a put-down.
- The Confidence Destroyer: She will pick on the words, grammar, or logic that you are using. This is an attempt to destroy any confidence you have and make you back down.
- The Denier: She will deny everything you say. You must be confused. She did not do it. If you do not have your facts in order, this tactic will throw you.
- The Expert Ploy: He starts a sentence with "All experts agree that
in hopes that these expert opinions will sway you to see things his way.
- The Genius: He will use big words and complex sentences that will probably go right over your head. If this is a technical matter, it may be wise to have a third party involved who knows the technical jargon.
- The Historian: She will bring up old conflicts or problems to try and embarrass or confuse you. She will point out the time you thought you knew best, but you were wrong. Remember that the past has nothing to do with the present situation.
- The Insulter: She will use nasty insults that will surprise you. She may even use something she knows about you to try and hurt you.
- The Know-It-All: He knows more than you will ever know, and he will even try to tell you that you do not think what you think or feel the way you think you feel.
- The Questioner: When you ask a question, he will reply with a question. This will cause a delay. This may lead you off track or give him more time to think of an answer.
- The Salesperson: She is pushing her perspective while denying yours. She is trying to put pressure on you or to make you feel guilty.
- The Statistics Ploy: This is similar to the Expert Play, but he is citing real or fictional statistics to try to change your opinion.
- The Story Teller: She will try to sidetrack the conversation with "This reminds me of the time when," and it will take the emphasis away from the topic.
- The Topic Changer: Again, this will be very frustrating because it will take the conversation away from the subject.
Remember these people are trying to get you off track. They do not want to receive the message you are sending. It is your responsibility to keep focused and deliver the message whether they like it or not.
Next section: Difficult Coworkers